Stevenisms: 5-14-01

scott told steven he would take him to play soccer sometime this weekend. steven said, 'all day!?' scott said, 'no. we would get hungry.' steven said, 'we can take food.' scott said, 'we would get tired.' steven said, 'we can take a blanket!'

steven's little dog, scooter, was sniffing around the kitchen floor and steven asked, 'is scooter still a crumb hunter?'

he brought me a pamphlet about some soccer camps from 8am to 12pm this summer. i told him that those wouldn't work because scott and i can't pick him up that early. he said, 'that's okay. i'll just stay and practice until you get off of work.'

steven was still working on his final chore to get the money to buy his mothra toy. this was the second time he had to go around picking up the sticks in the yard since he didn't get finished the first time. i was raking leaves and he asked, 'am i a slave?' i said, 'no. slaves don't get paid and you are getting paid.' he said, 'i don't like being a slave. do slaves get paid if they do more that what they were told to do?'

later at a restaurant, he asked, 'are the people who work here slaves?' i said, 'no. they get paid to work.' he asked if there were any slaves in the world anymore. i said there were some places. he asked, 'who gets paid to watch the slaves?' i said that i wasn't sure. he asked who watched the restaurant workers. i said that the manager did. so he looked for the manager when we were leaving to see if he was watching the workers.

while dining, steven wanted another straw. they were sitting on a ledge about 8 feet from our table. steven crouched down and tip toed over to the straws and stealthily snatched a straw and tiptoed back to the table like he was in some kind of cartoon.

while discussing how to dispose of all of the leaves in our back yard. 'trash' was mentioned, and steven piped up, 'trashy people are bad. they should recycle.'

while eating his pancakes, steven looked at me, opened his mouth wide and shoved in a whole scoop of butter. a minute later he made a face and spit it out and exclaimed, 'i thought it was whipped cream!' dastardly restaurant employees snuck that butter in along the whipped cream! evil slaves!

steven is always asking for toys and such. i tell him, 'get a job.' so one day, he looks at me and in all seriousness asks, 'what kind of job can i get?' i thought about it a while and realized i just lost clever come-back. darn kid is willing to work!